What’s Holding You Back?

I was born without patience.

My mother always told me I was born without it, and until recently I believed that statement to be true. Maybe it was a joke because I was an overly dramatic child, but I’ve had no control over my temper, and throughout my life, I’ve lost what little patience I did have more times than I like to admit. 

I couldn’t help it, I was born without patience after all.

It may sound silly. I mean, it does sound silly. That phrase really doesn’t make sense. When I first realized this, I took a step back and said those words to myself a few times, really paying attention to their significance. I was born without patience. Was I though? Can you really be born with or without anything? In that moment, I decided patience is a learned behavior to some extent. It can be practiced. We can become better or worse at it over time, and it is without a doubt in our control.

After realizing how this phrase has followed me throughout my entire life, I decided to change it. I decided to be a patient person, and I would accomplish that by practicing patience. One thing I was born with is the freedom to choose how I act. I have the freedom to be anyone and anything I desire, all I have to do is choose. Choose to be patient. Choose to be kind, funny, quiet, or loud.

I am free to determine how my life turns out.

The world of limiting beliefs stretches far and wide. A limiting belief is a statement you believe to be true, even though there is no solid evidence for its existence. There is no basis or explanation to it at all. However, these beliefs control our lives. Without even thinking about them, they influence every single decision we make. They affect how we perceive both our current and future selves, and they hold us back from reaching our full potential.

Here are a few examples of limiting beliefs:

  • “I’ll never find love.”
  • “Nothing good ever happens to me.”
  • “My family was always poor.”

The following examples allow for growth, love and freedom:

  • “Love is all around me.”
  • “Good things happen to me everyday!”
  • “I have many opportunities to earn and save money.”

Changing the phrases we say to ourselves can change our lives.

I started saying “I am patient” instead of “I was born without patience.” That was all it took. Yes, it took repeating that many, many, many times before I started to believe it, but it gave me the freedom to change how I reacted in my everyday life. I now notice myself being able to stay calm in stressful situations. I can deal with people easier than I used to. When I do get a little frustrated with someone or something out of my control, I remind myself that I am patient. I can handle any situation with grace.

I challenge to you sit down and think of what your limiting beliefs are. What do you use as an excuse when things don’t turn out the way you wanted? What words do you use to describe yourself when you try to be modest because you don’t want to brag? Go deep within and be honest with yourself. Do you really believe what you are saying? This is not an easy process. It will take lots of reflection and love, but in the end, you will free yourself from unnecessary limiting beliefs. You will grant yourself the freedom to live the life you have only ever imagined in your dreams.

Melissa Rafalko

Her dream job is to be a princess, but for now, she sticks with being a scientist who has a big imagination. Melissa is from Scranton, Pennsylvania and currently calls Nashville, Tennessee her home. Her family is her life. She loves her dog, Jodi, and her cat, Johnny Bear. Oh, and she is reading the Harry Potter books for the first time, and she thinks they are amazing!

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