You can’t fall out of real love. Even if you’re not with them anymore, the love will stay. It doesn’t matter how old or mature you were, your first love will stay in your heart forever. I am not talking about a random first fling or the person you dated as a dare. I am talking about the first time you experienced real love for someone. It doesn’t need to be your first relationship, hell it could be your second, third or fourth. It could’ve been someone you went out on a few dates with or just someone you really liked, whatever the situation was; in your heart you knew that this was real.
Why I could never let you go? I ask myself this question all the time. Years have passed since you were a part of my life, somehow you managed to make it seem complete. Was it because you saw that side of me no one else did or because just your mere presence made everything seem right? Was it because I couldn’t imagine my day ending without hearing your voice or your knocking on my door every morning became my new alarm clock? Was it because you cared more about me taking care of myself than I ever did or because you’d walk with me in the middle of the night because I was craving ice-cream? Was it because we connected at such a level that could not even be explained by logic or because I was living the illusion of your love? You have and will always be the magnet that pulls me to you every time we are together. I guess that’s what you call the power of true love. What I felt for you was real and even though we were never right for each other, you will always hold a special place in my heart.
Letting go is one of the hardest things humans experience in their lives. Not just the feeling of love but the person itself. Connection need not be consistent. It can happen in moments but those moments are enough to last a lifetime. So it doesn’t matter that things ended a while ago or you haven’t seen this person in a while, it’s when you are around them that you realize the spark that never faded and it probably never will. It is this spark that hinders you from moving on 100%.
There is no denying that this person was special. It’s not easy to love someone so much with all their flaws. However, don’t hold on because of the fear of never experiencing true love again. I am not saying that you will definitely find true love again, although I really hope you do, but you will never know until you take that chance. When you give your heart and soul to someone and invest so much time into building something special with them, it gets very difficult to throw it all out of the window. Infact, I don’t even think its entirely healthy to abandon your experience altogether. Etch the good memories in your heart and remove all the negativity associated with it. This person made you experience the strongest emotion of all. Don’t beat yourself over the fact that you haven’t been able to get over them 100%, I know I haven’t, probably never will but that’s okay! Always remember, your first love never really dies but true love will come that will bury it alive.