What Experiencing Both Writer’s Block and Depression Has Taught Me

Writing is a very difficult job. It is something we as writers want to pour our hearts and soul into. It something that we work for hours to perfect because we want it to make sense to our audience. We want to make sure we get our point across with enough information to back up and support the material we are writing about.

As creators and creative spirits, our minds are always rolling with ideas, and sometimes ideas pop up in our think tanks at the worst time possible. I cannot tell you how many times a creative idea has woken me up in the middle of the early morning. Being a free spirit is both a blessing and curse for that reason.

As writers, we also deal with our biggest enemy and our version of the monster under the bed:Writer’s block. When you want to work to say that you at least composed something, but your brain just won’t form the words. Besides. you know if you just sit down to write when your brain won’t cooperate, it is more likely to end up being a horrible piece done with no pride or satisfaction.

What’s the point in that? When you look back, you will see something you wrote just for the sake of creating words instead of carefully crafting and putting together your best pieces of writing. I guess you can also call it writer’s gulit as well. As a writer, we should constantly have something to say and something to write about, right? When the writer’s block hits, the feeling of not being able to write normally is something that is hard to swallow.

For the past two months, I have been dealing with writer’s block. It was almost as if I was running out of ideas to write about. I felt like I was a loser who could get nothing done and accomplished at first. Then, I took a step back and realized that because of my brain falling me in the writing department, I was also dealing with depression. When my depression overtakes me, it is hard for me to get out of bed, and I don’t even think about coming to my desk to write.

I had lost all motivation, and to be quite frank, I had lost myself in my sorrows. I am generally a very happy and outgoing person, and if you spend any time with me at all, both the aspects of happy and outgoing are very noticable. So, when I was slipping into my depression, I knew I did not feel right. I wasn’t my normal happy self. I had lost my desire to keep with my normal routine of doing a writing excercise and then coloring. I just sat in my recliner, day after day mad at myself.

I was mad at myself for pushing my passion of writing to the wayside. I had thrown not only my God Given talent to the side, but at this point, I had thrown myself to the side as well. As someone who is naturally socially and emotionally intuitive, I knew this wasn’t how I wanted to feel. It’s almost like the writer’s block and the depression combined come back and just suck the life from your brain, little by litle. However, I knew that I had to allow everything to run its course. I had to shake the despair and sadness before picking up a writing idea; I had to build myself back up and bring back my own happiness again. I am one of those people wh believe you are responsible for your own happiness and attitude. With depression, I realize that that is a different subject entirely. You cannot control when it will hit you. It’s a bit like a tidal wave in that sense, as is writer’s block.

Yet, I still felt it was my fault. The brain is a strange thing sometimes. It has been a bit of a wild ride. The good news is that I am now back on my writing game and more determined than ever to keep making excellent content for both myself and my readers.

Karla Culbertson

Karla is a 33 year old independent writer. She is wheelchair dependent due to Cerebral Palsy, chronic pain, and hip dysplasia, but she does not let that stop her from enjoying life. It is Karla's goal in life to inspire and uplift others. She loves writing positive blog posts that may have the potential of inspiring others and bettering their lives.

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