Where Did Old-School Romance Disappear?

Call me a hopeless romantic, but I truly believe that old school romance was romance at its purest form. It is something millennials like us cannot even comprehend. Modern dating is easy, convenient and honestly quite unreliable. In today’s times, people change their partners faster than they change their mobile phones. What we tend to do is blame external factors for our lack of commitment. What modern dating really lacks is that old world charm, the factor that made dating special to begin with.

Modern dating is the definition of being casual.

I am not saying that relationships don’t thrive in today’s time or that happy couples don’t exist. All I am saying is that the majority of the population is so awestruck by the ease of entry and exit in relationships that they don’t see the point of going out of their way in order to pursue the real thing. No one is willing to put his or her guard down and let love in, in the real sense. Everyone wants to play it cool and be casual in an attempt to not come across as needy or desperate. Love as an emotion hasn’t changed over the years; ways of showing it or rather hiding it definitely has.

Gone are the days when:

  • Love was free of distraction and technology had still not taken over our lives. Today two people spend more time on their phone than they do in person. I am not saying technology is a bad thing. If used for the right reasons it can really nurture a relationship; however if overused can be very detrimental to two people.
  • A guy would come to your doorstep to pick you up as opposed to sending you a text, “I am here, come down”, if he offers to pick you up to begin with. In most cases you tend to meet directly at the pre-decided place.
  • Guys would come with flowers before a date. Honestly, I don’t blame them that they don’t. For generation Y individuals, something as simple as flowers can get suffocating and ‘too much’. What we don’t realize that there is a difference between a bouquet of flowers and a marriage proposal and one cannot be mistaken for another.
  • Guys would jump out of the car to open the door or hold doors open for girls.
  • People picked up their phones and called someone instead of sending a message, frantically waiting for the ticks to turn blue.
  • Your partner would surprise you by saying ‘come down, I am waiting for you’ because who has the time to be so cheesy right?
  • People would write meaningful letters and notes that could be cherished for a lifetime vs. sending messages on Snapchat that literally last as long as the chat is open.
  • People would go for picnics and outings, sit on the grass, lay under the stars and just talk as opposed to going to the nearby bar and getting drunk.
  • Individuals would formally ask the other person on the date. We are all so immersed in our fear of rejection that rather than saying ‘will you go out on a date with me’, people prefer to say ‘lets hang out or lets catch up’.

We are so caught up in not putting ourselves out there in an attempt to not getting hurt that we end up missing the real essence of love.

Old school romance is hard, time-consuming and exhausting; but it’s also real, something that modern dating will not be able to match in a hundred years. I am not saying that I want someone to promise me the moon and the stars because I am a fan of old school romance not a fool. However I do hope that someone will lie on the grass and watch them with me. Nobody said love was going to be easy, but again nothing in life worth having ever is.

Tanzeela Sareea

A simple girl, dreamer and hobbyist writer. Avid reader and writer. Loves to travel and explore new places and cultures. With a dual degree in Psychology and Finance, her main interest lies in relationships and human psychology.

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